Re-learning how to pray
…‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’ — Luke 18:13
‘Prayer is not a place to be good, it is a place to be honest. Prayer is not a place to perform, it is a place to be present. Prayer is not a place to be right, it is a place to be known.’ — Kyle Strobel
What’s the prayer you find yourself praying most?
Recently, I’ve found myself praying just three words over and over again throughout the day:
God, help me.
When I feel overwhelmed by things that I can’t control—God, help me.
When I’m faced with decisions and I don’t know what to do—God, help me.
When I’m confronted with temptation or shame—God, help me.
There’s nothing special about these three words other than the fact that they’re honest. I really mean it when I ask God for help, because I know I desperately need Him.
I’ve also found that short prayers like this also help me avoid performance or pretence in my relationship with God.
Often without realising it, we so often end up treating prayer as something we need to get right in front of God and other people.
That’s why we can end up praying with a lot of words and trying to say them in the correct way—convincing ourselves that the longer and more eloquent we are, the more God will take notice and listen to us, and the more people will approve of us.
We can often feel this pressure to perform when we’re praying, because deep down, we’re worried about praying in a way that’s acceptable to God and others.
But praying as a performance—either to get God’s attention or gain people’s approval—is missing the whole point of it.
Jesus knows this. That’s why He spoke directly to this problem:
“When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them” (Matthew 6:5).
“When you pray, don’t babble on and on as the Gentiles do. They think their prayers are answered merely by repeating their words again and again” (Matthew 6:7).
Elsewhere, He tells the story of how a Pharisee and a tax collector chose to pray in the Temple: the Pharisee publicly thanked God that He was not like other sinners, while the tax collector sorrowfully cried out to God to have mercy on him (Luke 18:9–14).
Both were there to confess their sin before God. But while the Pharisee performed self-righteously, the tax collector simply prayed honestly.
And it was the tax collector, not the Pharisee, was the one who was made right in God’s sight.
God doesn’t want me to perform or pretend when I pray. He’s not interested in me putting on a show or hiding behind a facade.
He wants me. He wants me as I am. Whatever I’m doing, however I’m feeling, wherever I’m going, He wants me to be with Him and to talk with Him honestly.
That’s what all good fathers want for their children—and our God is the perfect Father, who knows what we need before we even ask Him (Matthew 6:8), and who loves to give Himself to us (Luke 11:13).
So, with His help, I’m trying to re-learn how to pray.
To speak honestly with my Father.
To tell Him simply that I need Him and that I love Him.
To know Him better and enjoy Him more every day.
If you want to join me on this journey, let me know—I’d love to hear from you and pray for you, too!
Love,
Theo
