Is Jesus your friend?
“I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn’t confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me.” — John 15:15
‘Jesus gives his friendship to all who trust him.’ — Drew Hunter
Earlier this month, I went camping in Cornwall with one of my best friends.
I’d actually only been to Cornwall a handful of times before, but this trip really did prove to me why so many people love it. I’m now one of them.
There were lots of highlights: watching the waves roll into Porthcothan Bay while sipping our morning coffees, walking over the cliffs to swim at Treyarnon Bay, cooking steaks over a fire on the beach while watching the sun wash the sky in peachy pinks, and watching England take one step closer to bringing it home on a stranger’s TV under the stars.
It was pretty close to the perfect summer weekend.
But the best part was getting to share it all with my mate.
Sure, I would have still enjoyed the experience if I’d gone by myself (and slept a lot better without my friend’s snoring). But I doubt it would have been nearly as life-giving.
I wouldn’t have had someone to share our favourite albums from our childhoods with, or someone who would provide wisdom about the next season of my life, or someone to laugh and eat and pray with.
Friendship fills our lives with meaning, significance and joy. It brings out the best in us, and allows us to be our truest selves. It really is one of God’s greatest gifts.
And for years, I’ve wanted to know Jesus more and more as my friend.
Lord, King, Saviour... Friend?
From a young age, I was aware of how great God is.
As I grew up reading my Bible, I saw the God who made everything just by speaking it into existence, who frees captives, overthrows corrupt kings and nations, heals diseases and calms storms and rescues sinners and defeats the evil one.
To me, it was clear that God is awesome—blazingly holy, limitlessly powerful, absolutely sovereign over all things. I understood what it meant to fear Him as Lord, King and Saviour, and that reverence has remained at the core of my faith throughout my life.
But when I went to uni, I met people who really seemed to know God primarily as their friend.
They still showed reverence towards Him in the way they prayed and worshipped and talked about Him—but their reverence was rooted in an obviously deep, close, loving friendship with Him that I hadn’t really encountered before.
I knew that Jesus talked about calling His followers His friends (John 15:15)—but I felt that I hadn't fully experienced friendship with Him for myself.
Ever since, I’ve longed to know Jesus as my friend. But I’ve also struggled to know how to fear Him and enjoy His friendship. To me, the two have seemed almost at odds with each other: the more you fear God, the less possible it feels to be His friend.
Recently, I shared these thoughts with my pastor, who then told me a verse that completely changed the way I’ve understood this dynamic:
‘The Lord is a friend to those who fear him. He teaches them his covenant.’ — Psalm 25:14
God is a friend to those who fear Him
Far from being at odds with one another, fear of God leads to friendship with Him. As we surrender ourselves to Him in humility and awe, He draws us into deeper and closer relationship with Himself.
That’s why Jesus tells His disciples, “You are my friends if you do what I command” (John 15:14). Following Jesus—being with Him, loving Him, doing what He says, imitating how He lived in the power of His Spirit—means that we become His friends, as we live our lives with Him, in Him and for Him.
And when you read the Bible through this lens, you start to see how God has always wanted to be our friend:
He walked with Adam and Eve in the cool of the day (Genesis 3:8).
He walked in close fellowship with Enoch (Genesis 5:24).
He considered Abraham His friend (Isaiah 40:8).
He spoke with Moses face to face as a friend (Exodus 33:11).
He sees His disciples as His friends in whom He can confide (John 15:15).
God has always desired our friendship—and through Jesus, He has made that possible, forever (1 Corinthians 1:9). Through the cross, He turned us from His enemies into His friends. Because of our sin, we were completely separated from Him. But God loved us enough to pay the ultimate price—the death of His Son Jesus—to bring us back to Himself (Colossians 1:21–22).
And what a friend we have in Jesus.
He knows us.
He forgives us.
He leads us.
He empowers us.
He cares for us.
He prays for us.
He shares His purposes with us.
He comforts us.
He weeps with us.
He laughs with us.
He is always with us.
He loves us without limit.
He is the very best friend we could ever hope to have.
Knowing Jesus’ friendship
In the morning before we headed back to Bristol from Cornwall, my friend and I spent some time journalling about what aspects of God we wanted to encounter more.
Here’s a little bit of what I wrote:
Abba, I want to know you as my friend and my love—the One whom I prioritise above all else and can’t wait to be with all the time. As my friend, I want to encounter your love, your joy, especially your sense of humour, your gentle challenge and your vast wisdom.
I want to prioritise Jesus above all else—counting everything as insignificant compared with knowing Him as my friend. I want to spend my days with Him—praising Him, sharing my worries with Him, laughing with Him, asking Him for help. I want to experience His limitless love for me as much as I can.
It’s absolutely breath-taking that the Lord of all things, the King of the universe and the Saviour of the world wants to be our friend.
May we joyfully accept His invitation.
Love,
Theo