The sacrifice God desires
‘The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God.’ — Psalm 51:17
‘My soul is like a house, small for you to enter, but I pray you to enlarge it. It is in ruins, but I ask you to remake it. It contains much that you will not be pleased to see: this I know and do not hide. But who is to rid it of these things? There is no one but you.’ — Augustine of Hippo, Confessions
The further I travel through the Christian life, the more I realise just how broken I am.
Even though I love Jesus, my words and actions so often fail to reflect His goodness and beauty.
Even though my mind is being renewed by the Spirit, my thoughts and desires still continue to stray from His truth.
Even though I am in Christ, sin and selfishness still have their way in my life and my relationships.
In fact, the more that God opens my eyes to see more of His holiness, the more I realise just how far I fall short without Him.
And yet, even though I know the glorious gospel truth that Jesus has taken my guilt and given me His righteousness so that I can come freely to the Father—I can still feel frustrated, defeated and disillusioned in my relationship with Him.
But rather than taking these things to God in prayer and repentance, I can allow shame to fester and grow in my life until it feels like an insurmountable barrier to His presence.
In this place of despondency, I continue going through the motions of prayer, worship, reading the Word and meeting with other believers—all without really being present to God.
I say all the right words, do all the right things—all while my heart feels far from Him.
I’m not alone. These are feelings that countless believers—from the apostle Paul, to Augustine, to thousands of us today—have experienced.
In times like these, there’s one verse in one of my favourite Psalms that I’ve come back to time and time again: “The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God” (Psalm 51:17).
The sacrifice that God desires
Where do we turn when we feel broken, ashamed, and defeated in our continued battle with sin?
We aren’t meant to run away from God in shame—but towards Him in repentance, trust and renewed obedience.
We run to Jesus.
David, the author of Psalm 51, was a man well acquainted with the reality of sin—and the shame that follows closely after it.
He had forced Bathsheba, a married woman, to sleep with him—and then, after finding out that she was pregnant with his son, had arranged for her husband Uriah to be killed in battle to cover it up (2 Samuel 11–12).
It’s a horrific story. David’s actions are inexcusable. But it gets worse.
David thinks he has got away with it—until he is confronted by Nathan the prophet, who tells David a parable of a rich man who steals and slaughters a treasured lamb from a poor man.
David is enraged at the story—the rich man deserves death! But then comes Nathan’s famous rebuke: “You are that man!” (2 Samuel 12:7).
Until this point, David is a terrible example of godly living and leadership. He has committed some of the most evil offences possible.
But it’s what he does next that gives broken sinners like you and me hope.
He will not reject a broken heart
After Nathan confronts his sin, David finally takes his guilt to God: “I have sinned against the LORD” (2 Samuel 12:13).
Psalm 51 records David’s famous prayer of repentance, in which he appeals to God’s “unfailing love” and “great compassion” for forgiveness.
Where does David go with his brokenness?
He doesn’t hide it from God. Faced with the reality of his sin, he delays no longer in taking it straight to his Father in heaven—the only one who can forgive, cleanse and ultimately restore him.
Astonishingly, scandalously, God forgives David: “Yes, but the Lord has forgiven you, and you won’t die for this sin” (2 Samuel 12:13).
God opens up a way back to relationship with Himself—not because David deserves it, but because of His own lavish grace and mercy.
Of course, there are still consequences to be paid for David’s catastrophic failure. His newborn son dies. His kingdom would be divided and eventually fall in the generations to come.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean that there aren’t repercussions for our sin. God has ordered His world such that we often need to live with—and work to repair—the personal and relational effects of our wrongdoing.
But what forgiveness does mean is that, for those who come to return to Him in repentance, there is always a way back to the Father in the aftermath of sin.
We, like David, can experience the joy of our salvation once more, no matter how far we have run or low we have fallen (see Psalm 51:12). He will never “reject a broken and repentant heart” (Psalm 51:17)—what a wonderful promise for us to cling to!
If David was able to run to God in his most vile, most evil moment, how much more are we able to run to Him now that we are in Jesus—the One in whom God has revealed to us the fullness of His love, grace and mercy?
If, today, you feel far from God and unable to come to Him because of your guilt and shame, look to Him. Remember all that He did for you at the cross—not just for some of your sins, but “once for all time” (Hebrews 10:10).
Don’t let your guilt and shame keep you from God’s presence—instead, let it be an invitation for you to run to Him.
If you are in Christ, you have been clothed in His righteousness—and you can “come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most” (Hebrews 4:16).
Run to Him in repentance. Rest in His unconditional, unreserved grace and love for you.
If you find yourself struggling for words, why not use Psalm 51 to guide you—or the beautiful prayer of Augustine that opened this email:
“My soul is like a house, small for you to enter, but I pray you to enlarge it. It is in ruins, but I ask you to remake it. It contains much that you will not be pleased to see: this I know and do not hide. But who is to rid it of these things? There is no one but you.”
Friend, as you run to Him, I pray that you “may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is” (Ephesians 3:18).
With love,
Mike